A sufficiently desperate amalgamated waffle sorter

You know what's weird?

Dreams.

There are, according to our culture, certain "standard" dreams. Flying, falling, being naked in inappropriate places.

I don't remember many of my dreams, but I don't remember ever remembering having one of those. The dreams I remember remembering have much more bizarre topics. Like...

• The One Where I Tried To Explain What I Meant By "I Am Harry Potter"
• The One With The Hole In Snowy Ground, That I Couldn't Get Away From
• The One With Murder And Ponies (though not, I think, murder of or by ponies) On A Lake
• The One Where Rainbow Dash Raced A Series Of Video Game Characters One-On-One (I'm pretty sure Samus was cheating

And so on. Weird stuff. Dreamlike stuff.

In my sociology class today, we watched a thing about how messed up the health-insurance system in America is.

And now I find I'm wanting to defeat someone or something, not by being right or logical, but by being louder, stronger, or otherwise more powerful.

This is not a feeling I'm very familiar with in myself, though I recognize it well enough from my experience of others. I'm generally more like, well, Spock or Fluttershy, but right now I'm feeling more like Worf or Rainbow Dash or Korra. And I'm not sure how to fix it.

So. This is Dreamwidth.

Could do with a bit of customization, but I imagine that'll be easy enough once it's high enough on my priority list.

I don't think I'll abandon LJ completely, if only because there are plenty of icon communities and personal accounts and so on that I'm reading through the archives of there and that I don't believe are also here, and also Milliways hasn't moved. But I am not going to post on LJ directly, or give them money, or so much as glance at any of their pages with any browser that doesn't have Adblock - no matter what computer - until things change for the decidedly better.

In other news, I think I'll do something approximating an Avatar marathon next week. It's been too long since I last watched it.

...Ooh, hey, what's this "choose random icon" thing? I may have to try that out at some point.

I wonder how many people can legitimately say that the voices in their heads keep them sane?

It's odd to say, I know. But if one's definition of sanity includes understanding and being able to deal with other people, I'd say it's accurate enough for me.

Way back when I started at Milliways, I believed I played Felix basically as myself. This was not entirely true - I played him as somewhere between myself and his canonical self, with a few aspects from neither. Vestiges of this remain to this day. But it sort of set the stage for playing him as he actually is, and even more, hearing him. The Felix who lives in my head today may not be precisely the canonical Felix. But he specifically isn't me. He has different goals, motivations, and responses than I do. And because he isn't me, but I have access to his personality, I have that much more understanding of persons-other-than-me. It's no longer exactly trial and error - or it is, but without external consequences.

And the other voices I've picked up along the way - Kain, and Rose, and Fluttershy, and Applejack, and to a lesser degree Spock and Karis, and even the alternate Felixes - all help. They're at different degrees of not-me, but more importantly, they're in different directions. Even if Rose were more like me, she wouldn't necessarily be more like Kain. Spock isn't on the same line as Fluttershy, no matter what their respective 'distances'. And so on. Which means that I have more places I can look to figure out what people expect, and how they will react to whatever I do.

I still don't expect to ever be "normal", but because of headvoices I think I can fake it better than I used to.

I just watched Temple Grandin, and it was... very interesting.

( Autism and me )

I don't remember if I was wanting to go anywhere in particular with this, but. Interesting.

Also, I don't recall having ever heard of Temple Grandin before tonight, although it seems like I should have.

I am not entirely pleased with my school schedule this semester.

Oh, the classes are all right, at least so far. But getting to and from...

My first class Mondays and Wednesdays starts at 1:00. If I walk, it takes me about forty-five minutes to get there. Driving's closer to ten, but means I have to deal with a car, and find parking, and maybe buy gas.

That class ends about fifteen minutes before the bus comes for the next stage. This bus, over the course of about fifteen minutes, gets me to another bus, which takes another half hour to get me to the other campus, where my other MW class is.

Or rather, almost to the other campus; the nearest stop is about six blocks away. So that's another twenty or so minutes of walking.

That class doesn't get out until quarter to six, at which point there's a little bit of sunset left. So I have to retrace the twenty-minute walk in the dark, and quite likely get to the bus stop shortly after the bus leaves, adding another half hour to wait for the next one.

All in all, I don't get home before about seven at night. It's even worse on Wednesdays, when I have another thing in the morning, which has me out of the house from eight-thirty until noon.

Well. A week has passed since I last posted, and quite a week it's been.

I got Dark Dawn, and am pleased with it. Not pleased enough with aspects of the worldbuilding to retcon my millicanon enough to fit, but I enjoy the game. Now I'm debating whether to cultivate a particular proto-headvoice for Milliways or give Felix opportunity to meet her.

Thursday, though, was pretty bad. I spent most of the day in bed, throwing up. The next three-four days were spent with a throat full of sore, a head full of stuffed, and ears full of ache. Monday was borderline, and Tuesday I felt well enough to resume life.

Unfortunately, Tuesday was prone to network and scheduling problems. And ljlogin becoming broken, for no good reason I can find. So now I am finally able to return to my internets, catch up on my flist, and so on. This afternoon I think I'll EP with some advance setup for a Dark Dawn-inspired plot.

In the meantime, have a meme.

Ask me about any character, and I will tell you some combination of:

a) five facts about them from my personal fanon
b) two reasons they're amazing
c) five things I'd like to see happen to them
d) three people I might ship them with and why
or
e) if I don't know them, I will make something up

Obviously, characters you know I know are best, but I doubt there are many of those; as long as you avoid non-Ghibli anime and manga, I should be able to do at least e) above.

From ceitfianna: Comment and I'll pick six interests of yours, which you then have to describe!

Fi picked:

( These six. )

If asked, I could ramble on about Avalon Code for considerably more time, but it wouldn't be long before the discussion dissolved into spoilery stuff or disjointed musings about characterization and worldbuilding.

New Mexico certainly isn't Utah. The weather-climate's not too different, so far, although there're a lot fewer plants out where you can see them. But the cultural climate...

Well, for instance. There are a lot more churches here. Not as many church buildings, that I can see, but a lot more different denominations. Also, some of them put up billboards, which you never see at all in the parts of Utah where I've been. It gets really weird when you see a "Jesus is watching you" sign right in front of an "adult videos" store - which you also wouldn't see in Utah.

In other news, I have a freshly-painted room now. It's a cave. The walls are brown, with some goldish color sponge-painted over. I still need to replace the ceiling fan/light fixture, though. I don't want something that looks like it's going to drop a baseball the size of my head on me at any moment.

The other day, I posted about a picture I made. Yesterday, I decided I might pimp it in adepts_gs and avatar_fans, the fandom comms for Golden Sun and Avatar, respectively.

Between the two, they've gotten six times as many comments as anything I've posted here. Felix may well have had threads that beat the total, and I think I got more the first time I hosted DE, but it's still something of a milestone.